Attachment in Poly Relationships

How I Support Clients Navigating Love with Multiple Partners

As a polyamorous, neurodivergent therapist, I know firsthand how much courage it takes to love differently in a world that centers monogamy and conformity. Whether you identify as solo-poly, in a nesting relationship, or navigating relationship anarchy, you deserve therapy that sees you as a person worthy of resonance, reflection, and attuned care.

In my practice, I offer polyamory-affirming therapy that blends attachment healing, parts work, somatic awareness, and ketamine-assisted psychotherapy. Together, we explore how you relate to others and yourself.

Attachment Is For All Relationships

In our work together, I invite clients to explore how attachment patterns appear in all of our relationships, particularly when we practice polyamory.

Polyamorous people often get left out of the attachment conversation. Yet we live it every day: in the pang of jealousy when a partner connects with someone new, in the ache of disconnection, in the fear of being "too much" or not enough. These reactions aren't signs that something’s wrong with you. They’re invitations to get curious.

I'll invite you to reflect on what's happening in your relationships. We'll explore what sort of questions you're asking about your relationships. Often, I find my clients want to understand more about their attachment fears and deep down are asking:

• Will others take care of me?

• Can I trust them?

• Can I rely on them?

These core attachment questions don’t disappear when we’re in multiple relationships. They often become more complex and layered. Therapy can help you hold all those layers with more clarity, compassion, and coherence.

Working with Polyamorous Clients: A Trauma-Informed, Creative Approach

My clients often arrive in therapy exhausted from struggling with emotional labor in their relationships that isn't creating the outcome they'd prefer. They’re tired of educating therapists about polyamory, tired of being pathologized, tired of feeling unseen.

Here’s what I offer instead:

• Attachment-focused therapy rooted in Internal Family Systems (IFS), which helps us understand and relate to the protective “parts” inside us (the one who panics when a partner is distant, the one who withdraws, the one who doesn’t feel worthy).

• Somatic techniques to regulate the nervous system, including vagus nerve exercises like humming, gargling, and "half salamander" movement to ground the body during emotionally intense moments.

• Expressive arts therapy to explore inner dynamics creatively: “If this feeling had a color, shape, or texture, what would it be?”

• Relational repair practices for transforming arguments into connection: Let go of being “right,” lead with love, reflect instead of reacting, and pace conversations so your nervous system can stay online.

And most importantly: I support your whole self, including your queerness, kink, spiritual practice, neurodivergence, and non-monogamy with curiosity.

What’s Underneath the Pattern?

In our work together, we don’t just label your attachment style and move on. We ask: What’s underneath the pattern? What need is trying to surface? What protector is stepping in to keep you safe? What younger part of you is trying to get your attention?

As I share in The Dance of Attachment, healing doesn’t mean erasing our instincts. It means meeting them with warmth, curiosity, and embodiment—and inviting them into connection with Self.

Integrating Ketamine Therapy for Attachment and Relationship Healing

For clients ready to go deeper, I offer Ketamine-Assisted Psychotherapy both online throughout California and in person in the Bay Area. Ketamine opens access to inner knowing, neuroplasticity, and re-patterning. This work can be powerful for clients working through attachment trauma or anxiety related to their polyamorous relationships.

During ketamine sessions, we can explore:

• The feeling of intuition in your relationships

• Somatic memory and body-stored relational trauma

• Reparenting younger parts with gentleness and creativity

• Expanding your capacity to hold grief, joy, and multiplicity at once

I integrate each ketamine session with grounded, practical support: artmaking, reflective writing, nervous system tools, and narrative work. You don’t have to do this alone.

A Space for All of You

Many of my polyamorous clients come to me longing for something simple: a therapist who honors the fullness of their love. Someone who doesn’t just tolerate complexity—but treats it as sacred.

If you’re looking for:

• Polyamory-affirming therapy

• Ketamine therapy in the Bay Area

• Online ketamine treatment in California

• Support for neurodivergent adults in open relationships

• Attachment therapy for those with multiple relationships

…then I invite you to connect.

Begin Your Journey

You don’t have to shrink to fit. You don’t have to untangle everything alone. Together, we can explore your patterns, nurture your capacity, and build relationships that nourish you.

Visit www.oliviaclear.com to schedule a free consultation and learn more about my offerings.

Let’s make room for your healing, your wholeness, and all of your relationships.